My KBOP Monday: Why Can’t I Get An Asian?

For a long time now, Asian cultures has been something people have been fascinated with.  While some are into Asian cultures for the beauty and tradition, others are in it for other reasons.  One of the  most annoying things I think I would see online would be people, mainly men, complaining about how they “can’t get an Asian” to be with them.  There’s nothing wrong with having a preference and being honest enough to not waste other people’s time in a relationship you’d rather not be in.  But often times, this notion comes across as very rude and offensive.  So after talking to a lot of Asian women on this subject, here is why this comes across as backwards and offensive.

Do You Know What You Are Saying?

For those who don’t know, Asia is a very large area with a very large population.  Almost 60% of the people living on earth live in Asia.  The land mass of Asia goes from the Middle East all the way to Russia.  There are also numerous island nations as well. Bottom line is most of us with a passport don’t have a clue what you mean when you say that you want an Asian.  And honestly, we wonder if you know what you mean as well.

Why Do You Feel This Way?

The reasons why some people say they want an Asian can border on perverted to ridiculous.  I’ve heard things ranging from how submissive Asian women are to how rich Asian men are to Asian people have good genes and can fight.  Love seems to have very little to do with anything.  If you were a man or woman who had people want to be with you for all the wrong reasons, you will become very sensitive to things like this.  So the question is, if you have sincere motives, how do you set yourself apart from the people who don’t?

Learn a Language and About a Culture

Since Asia is such a broad continent, narrowing things down to a specific country, language or culture may be best.  Asian people are not the “model minorities” that some claim they are.  Showing respect for someone’s culture and how they were raised is very important.  Also, showing that you will try to communicate with their family in the language that they feel comfortable with can be a big plus.  Usually a person who has a superficial or perverted reasoning for wanting someone will not take the time to study all of this.  Knowing more about a culture will prepare you for some of the trials you may face in a relationship.

Be a Friend Before Anything Else

Being someone’s true friend and caring for them goes a long way when looking for love.  The best love stories are made up of two people who are best friends.  Learn to care for a person for the right reasons and love will follow.

Remember That Asian People Are People

From My KBOP, there are a lot of similarities between different Asian cultures and the culture I grew up around.  The reason?  Because we are all just people at the end of the day.  Treat people with respect, and you will be shown respect.  Don’t lie about who you are and what you are.  Treat an Asian woman like you would any other woman, and an Asian man like you would any other man.  You’ll likely get a better response if you do things this way.

The people in the Asian community are truly wonderful and beautiful inside and out.  There’s nothing wrong, strange or abnormal about being an non Asian that wants to date/marry an Asian person.  But just remember to keep things respectful.  If you do, you may just find the love of a lifetime.

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